Anchor Tilbury 3 - 1 Oaks Athletic & Oaks Athletic 1 - 4 Anchor Tilbury (League games 15 & 16)

You'll have to excuse the briefness of this report, but recalling the events of this double header brings back the sort dark and disturbing images that I can only imagine would be comparable to waking up to find Parker laying naked next to you smoothered in strawberry flavoured Angel Delight.

To get that awful image out of your mind I will describe the one bright moment before breezing over the other 119 minutes and 50 seconds of misery. The Oaks kicked off, passed the ball around the midfield and worked the ball to Jordan on the edge of area. Weeeeed then unleashed a dipping shot which sailed over the keeper and into the net off the underside of the crossbar. Only 10 seconds had been player, the opposition hadn't touched the ball, and Jordan had scored one of the goals of the season. Those who think this story surely couldn't have a sad ending obviously haven't seen Bambi.

Although Anchor looked dangerous going forward, Eye-Ball still felt they needed some help and gifted them the equaliser by underhitting a backpass which was easily intercepted and worked into the goal. From here it was all down hill, and the first of the two matches was eventually lost 3-1.

The second match wasn't much better, but there was a glimmer of hope that The Oaks might grap a point when Nathan once again found the back of the net when he beat the keeper to the ball and headed over him and into the goal making the score 2-1. However, injuries to Kenny (t.y.) and Scott saw The Oaks reduced to nine men and they ended up losing 4-1.

It's not so much the two defeats that made this such a disappointing 120 minutes, but the manner of the defeats. We may well have played to our best and still lost both games, but as it was this was probably our worst performance of the season. Anchor's enthusiasm and desire to win seemed to intimidate us, and we just rolled over and let them dictate from start to finish. We lacked the hunger and commitment that you can't win a football match without and simply didn't function as a team. This might sound a little melodramatic - it is only the Thurrock Sunday League afterall - but this wasn't a fun experience and to think that we all paid for the privilege must make us some sort of masochists.

Whether we win, lose or draw we can still enjoy ourselves in the process if we can honestly say we have given 100% for each other and the team. Good luck for Sunday, and I hope you have fun.

Eye-Ball

I don't usually mention other results but I just wanted to congratulate my brother's team, Mustang (good team rubbish name), who beat Ockendon Motorspares 3-2 in the Ted Fairchild Cup last week. Apparently they didn't expect a 2nd division side to give them much trouble. That'll teach them.

Scoring chart:

Oaks Athletic 1 - 2 Rec Rovers and Rec Rovers 2 - 3 Oaks Athletic (League games 13 & 14)

The first double header of the season would have left most Oaks players with mixed feelings whilst they chewed on their Sunday roast. I think there would have been some disappointment that we hadn’t been able to replicate the display from two week previous, but also some encouragement from the fact that we rallied to win the second game and take a share of the points.

Milesy had the luxury of 16 players to choose from for this double header which, compared to the bare eleven for the opposition gave us an immediate advantage. The fact that it was a double header meant that everyone would have the opportunity to be involved, and Milesy showed his superb man management skills by ensuring every player got at least 60 minutes (equivalent to one game) on the pitch. For the first game he understandably started with the same eleven who performed so well against Belhus:

pppppppppppppppppppTyrone (GK)

ppppEye-Ball (RB) Milly (CB) Deano (CB) Parker (LB)


Jimmy (RM) Gollum (CM) Rob (CM) Jordan (CM) Scott (LM)


ppppppppppppppppppppNathan (CF) (c)

Subs: Kenny (the younger), Casey, Aaron, Stu, Landon

There must be something galvanising about the air at Belhus Park, as normal service was resumed at Blackshots with The Oaks being slow out of the blocks and struggling to make the passes count or settle into any sort of rhythm. The early pressure nearly all came from Rec Rovers, who took the lead midway through the first half when their forward struck a rasping shot following a corner. Ty did well to get his finger tips to it, but could not prevent the ball from nestling in the back of the net: 0-1.

Little improved in the first half, and by half time the Oaks were two nil down when the same striker who had put Rec Rovers in front evaded his marker on the by-line and put in a low cross that was neatly finished from 8 yards: 0-2.

No one would have been more frustrated at this first half performance than Milesy, who must have wondered how deploying the same tactics that had seen us win 4-1 in the last match now saw us 2-0 down inside 30 minutes. He made three changes for the second half with Casey, Aaron and Stu replacing Jimmy, Jordan and Gollum. We also reverted back to 4-4-2 with Scott moving up front to offer Nathan some much needed support.

The game definitely opened up in the second half, and the Oaks started to dominate possession and chances. With the exception of a fine one handed reaction save, and a bit of tom foolery in the penalty area, Ty had very little to do. However, we still struggled to create any clear cut chances in front of goal, and when the opportunity did arise to shoot hesitation and a lack of conviction meant these chances went begging.

The Oaks did finally get a goal with the final kick of the game, when a long throw in was scrambled over the line by a combination of Aaron and Rob. Although Rob thought he had the ball over the line before a goal was actually awarded, Aaron was credited with the decisive poke and with it his first goal of the season: 1-2.

After a ten minute break it was time to do it all again for the second of the double headers. Milesy changed the team around to make sure everyone got a fair go, and went with the following line up:

ppppppppppppppTyrone (GK)


Kenny (t. y.) (RB) Milly (CB) Deano (CB) Aaron (LB)


p Casey (RM) Jordan (CM) Stu (CM) (c) Scott (LM)


pppppppppppNathan (CF) Landon (CF)

Subs: Eye-Ball, Parker, Rob, Gollum, Jimmy

The Oaks starting eleven were definitely the fresher, with six having already played no more than 30 minutes. Add to this the fact that this was one of the most youthful sides the Oaks had fielded in some time (I won’t make any exceptions), and you would hope Rec would be made to work extremely hard to get anything out of the replay.

Those expecting a “however” moment will be disappointed, as the Oaks took full advantage of their extra energy, and started to find time and space on the ball that had eluded them in the first match. This meant they grew in confidence and finally started playing some really nice passing football. This game also saw the first start in at least 3 years for our very own American export, and it seemed his time on the other side of the pond playing ‘soccer’ had done some good as his touch, hold up play and awareness frequently brought others into the game and meant we posed a much greater threat in attack.

In a complete reversal of the previous match it was the Oaks turn to take the lead, as Nathan pealed off his marker to race on to a ball over the top and hit a cracking trademark volley across the keeper and into the far corner of the net. Nathan’s finishing has improved remarkably this season, and from my position running the line I had a perfect view of this sublime finish: 0-1

With Nathan and Landon linking up with the wide men the Oaks were getting a lot of joy down the channels, as Rec Rovers appeared to have run out of steam. It wasn’t long before The Oaks extended their lead with Nathan once again breaking away down the right and into the box. Landon had got himself into a good position in the box, but wasn’t needed in the end as Nathan’s attempted pass hit a divot which redirected it into the bottom corner: 0-2.

It is worth mentioning that, whilst Nathan was grabbing all the headlines, Milly was having a superb match at the other end of the field, which meant Rec’s one attacking threat was completely neutralised. It seems sleepless nights and dirty nappies are the perfect preparation for the job of defending on a cold Sunday morning. Thanks to Milly and the overall team performance, Rec looked dead and buried. However (there had to be one), they were handed the footballing equivalent of 10 litres of Red-Bull when a goal was bundled in through a sea of bodies in the Oaks area. All involved were convinced an offside decision should have been given, but when the ref consulted the linesman (aka Parker) he had to admit that he had been distracted by the pink elephants jumping hurdles on the adjacent running track: 1-2.

With a comfortable 3 points now looking like it could become a disappointing 1 (or worse) some managers may have been reluctant to make wholesale changes, but Milesy kept with his plan to rotate the team and give everyone a game. To this end Jimmy, Gollum and Rob came on for the second half to replace Aaron, Deano and Milly. The Oaks looked the stronger team again in the second half, and extended their lead when a fine cross from Landon would have fallen invitingly for Nathan if it hadn’t been for the intervening defender. Unfortunately he was more determined to upstage Nathan’s finishing rather than clearing the ball and headed the ball into the top corner: 1-3.

The remainder of the game was all about missed chances and final nervous moments. The stand out chances to put the game out of reach fell to Landon and Casey twice. Firstly Landon took up a great position in the penalty area to meet a cross from Casey, but perhaps forgot which way he was shooting as the powerful header we expected turned into a lame back pass. Space was starting to opening up in abundance, and twice Casey took advantage of this to latch onto cross field balls and create goal scoring opportunities. The first time he turned inside onto his favoured left foot and, with only the keeper to beat chose power over placement but came closer to breaking a window in one of the flats than the net. The second time Casey chose to stay on his right, but unfortunately the end result was very similar.



The nerves came in the last five minutes when the ball was threaded through to the Rec Rovers’ striker, who turned his man and slotted home: 2-3. As if things couldn’t get any worse, with 53 seconds remaining Rec won a throw in a dangerous position, which consequently turned to a corner. Fortunately this came to nothing, and The Oaks were able to run down the clock and secure the win: 2-3.

It was really encouraging to see so many players turn up for the Oaks this week, especially when other teams seem to be struggling for numbers at the moment. Hopefully everyone enjoyed the matches and with another double header next week our enthusiasm and commitment will be doubly important.

Eye-Ball


Next Match: Sunday 14th March AWAY @ Blackshots v Anchor (double header) 11:00 K.O.

Belhus Park Athletic 1 - 4 Oaks Athletic (League Game 12)

The Oaks returned to winning ways on Sunday in emphatic style, with a 4-1 victory over bottom club Belhus Park Athletic. Amazingly this was our first win since November, and came off the back of our two heaviest defeats of the season (losing 7-2 twice to Stanford). The awful weather and boggy conditions could do little to dampen the spirits of those in the red and black, and I’m sure everyone would agree that this is the most fun we’ve had on the football field for a while.

Perhaps the improved performance and result can be partly attributed to Milesy’s astute tactical decision to move Rob up into a five man midfield and play Nathan as a sole striker:

pppppppppppppppppppTyrone (GK)

ppppEye-Ball (RB) Milly (CB) Deano (CB) Parker (LB)

Jimmy (RM) Gollum (CM) Rob (CM) Jordan (CM) Scott (LM)

ppppppppppppppppppppNathan (CF) (c)
Subs: Aaron

The extended warm up granted to the Oaks thanks to Belhus’ lack of enthusiasm for putting up the posts, and the ref’s evident reluctance to take off his track suit, seemed to be exactly what we needed. For the first time in ages we were actually quick out of the blocks, and looked the far better side in the opening exchanges.

The two previous thrashings had obviously been character building experiences, as you could almost taste the determination from all on the team to hand out our own blend of humiliation to a team who were evidently inferior to Stanford Wanderers, and seemed prepared to give us as much time on the ball as we wanted. The Oaks seemed to have found their voice, and were always quick to offer the man on the ball an outlet. As a result we were retaining possession much more successfully than in previous weeks, and suddenly the game looked easy.

Belhus really didn't look like they had much to offer, and apart from giving them a couple of half sniffs thanks to Ty being even more cocky than usual in his penalty area, the Oaks were totally dominant.

It wasn't a surprise that it was the Oaks who took the lead, but it was still a big relief to see Nathan latch on to a ball through the middle, out muscle the two centre backs, and round the keeper to score: 0-1.

The confidence surging through the Oaks ranks grew and grew as the half went on, and the fluidity of the midfield, with players overlapping and moving into the space, left Belhus chasing shadows. Some might have feared that Nathan would have found himself isolated upfront, but the Oaks played a high line; compressing the play and meaning that there was never much of a gap between Nathan and at least one of Gollum, Jordan and Rob. In fact, even the forward position seemed interchangeable, with Nathan often dropping deep to get involved in play and Gollum letting his natural strikers' instinct take over. On one such occasion he found himself through on goal, but seem to run backwards and was unable to get a shot away.

Despite our dominance, one goal was never going to be enough, and when the second goal arrived it was thanks to some real quality from Scott and Jordan down the left. The acorns of the Oaks side (Aaron's more like the pod from which the acorn grows) linked up well before Scott found space and crossed low across the box where the on-rushing Rob wrapped a left foot round the ball and divert it beyond the keeper: 0-2.

When stand-in skipper Nathan beat the offside trap and rounded the keeper, many would have thought he had wasted a great opportunity to extend the Oaks lead even further by running the ball too wide; however, he underlined his quality by finishing superbly from a tight angle for his second of the game and eleventh of the season: 0-3.

The score line could have looked even more lopsided before half time, especially given Rob's dominance in the air. Belhus really couldn't get close to him, and every corner or long throw looked like it was going to end up in the back of the net. It wasn't just Rob who was looking to take advantage from the set pieces, with Deano volleying home from one of many fine deliveries from Scott. Unfortunately the ref had already blown his whistle to sort out pushing by the Belhus keeper on our player; which was one of his many strange decisions.

So the half finished with the score at 3-0 to the Oaks, and we were able to truly enjoy Milesy's sunny disposition for 10 minutes.

It was hardly surprising that the second half didn't quite live up to the first, with the pitch - which was becoming more and more of a bog - being a contributing factor to this. Some of the intensity from the first half was lost, and Belhus were even given a sniff of hope when, following an Oaks corner, the substitue striker held off Milly and finsihed well passed Ty (who still hadn't made a save). The substitute striker continued to cause the Oaks problems, and it is a mystery why he didn't play from the outset: 1-3.

The next quarter of an hour was a nervy period, as we knew that another goal for Belhus would give them a real boost and could lead to the unimaginable happening. We continued to create chances, and Nathan had two very good opportunities to get his hat-trick. The first time he was felled on-route to goal, for what we thought was a penalty. However, the referee decided to defer the decision to the obviously impartial Belhus linesman (insert sarcastic tone), who said the foul had been outside the area. Rather than argue, the Oaks just got on with it and Scott came narrowly close to extending the lead. Nathan's other chance to get his hat-trick - a rasping shot from just inside the area - was deflected wide by the keeper's face.

The game was settled when Rob's dominance in the air finally paid off, with Scott's pin point corner being powerfully headed home: job done: 1-4.

They say everyday you learn something new, and The Oaks players never cease to provide a source of education. This Sunday I learned that "a weed" is not only a nuisance plant, an 80's indie band, and a weak man. It also refers to the flying, heading shy younger brother of the Oaks goalkeeper whose challenge left the opposition captain spitting expletives and was greeted by shout of "you've been done by a weed!"

This was a really enjoyable game, which will hopefully dispell the doubts about whether we still had something to offer in this league. It's just a shame that we don't have a game next week, but don't forget what this felt like, which should be all the encouragement we need for the rest of the season.

Eye-Ball

Oaks Athletic 2 - 7 Stanford Wanderers (League game 11)

Those professional ‘spot the difference’ exponents will notice the one glaringly obvious difference between the last week’s and this week’s match report: this week the Oaks appear first in the score line. In actual fact the amateur players amongst you will notice that the two reports are completely different; it was suggested that I just copy and paste last week’s report – but I wouldn’t sell you short like that!

The one positive at the end of another ninety minutes of woe was that it will be at least another 5000 hours before we have to even contemplate playing Stanford Wanderers again, or listening to their incessant whining. Thanks to Sharpy’s curiosity we at least got to see how they would react if someone really gave them a kick – I think hissy fit pretty much sums it up.

Once again we were completely outplayed over the 90 minutes, but it was a better performance than last week overall, with just our inability to deal with deliveries from set pieces being the major problem. With the ball over the top being our biggest concern from last week Milesy went for a tactical change; packing the centre of the park, and deploying a sweeper:

ppppppppppppppppppTy (GK)

pppppppppppppppppMilly(SW)

pppppppppppppRob (CB) Eye-Ball (CB)
ppDeano (RWB)ppppppppppppppppppppppp Scott (LWB)

ppppppppppJordan (CM) Stu (CM) (c) Jimmy (LM)

pppppppppppNathan (CF) Gollum (CF)

Subs: Sharpy, Aaron, Parker

The new formation seemed to be working OK to start with. We were definitely a lot more competitive in midfield and the route through the middle of the field was well a truly blocked. The problem is that Stanford play a very fluid formation, and simply moved their play to the flanks, where space had naturally developed. Scott and Deano worked tirelessly up and down the wings, but invariably found themselves overrun.

It was a break down the flank that led to the first goal for Stanford. Ty intercepted the initial low cross from the by-line, sending the ball high into the air. The ball wasn’t dealt with before coming back to earth and fell invitingly for a Stanford player to poke home: 0-1.

The next goal was the first of many to result from a cross or set piece; whilst Eye-Ball stayed with his man he was beaten to the ball at the edge of the six yard box and the Stanford player’s well directed header was pretty much unstoppable: 0-2.

The third and fourth goals followed in quick succession; both as a result of exploiting the space on the left hand flank. First the ball was played across the middle, and into the path of the on-rushing fullback, who was tracked all the way by Scott, but could not be prevented from crossing low to the back post to be bravely met the onrushing Stanford player. Next the same player who had supplied the cross found himself unmarked in the box and finished well across Ty: 0-4.

We obviously hadn’t adapted as well to the new formation as Milesy had hoped, and so reverted back to the more familiar 4-4-2. This seemed to help stabilise the team, and we even managed to pull a goal back before half-time when Robbie beat Scott, Deano and all the opposition to the loose ball, following a Nathan long throw, to poke home his second goal of the season: 1-4.

The half time team talk was pretty straight forward: get your heads up and keep trying to play football. Sharpy came on for the second half for what will be his last appearance for this season at least. He is finally going in for the op that he has been putting off for some time, and he showed glimpses of why he will be sorely missed. His desire for the ball, and determination to win the ball and bring others into play made us a much more dangerous threat. Best of luck from all at The Oaks Sharpy, and hopefully you’ll make a speedy recovery.

Despite improving in most areas we still managed to concede a further three goals in the second half. Again it was set pieces and deliveries into the box that caused the problem; one goal was exceptionally unlucky, and Milly’s attempt to clear a cross resulted in the ball looping off the outside of his boot and into the back of the net. The pattern continued as a Stanford player found himself unmarked at the front post and headed home with ease from a corner.

It is not unusual for memories of frightening or unpleasant events to be repressed as part of the coping mechanism. The fact that I can’t remember the 7th goal is evidence of this. My guess is that it came as a result of another corner.

Just like last week we had a perfectly good goal ruled offside. This time it was Deano who ran from deep to collect the ball and finish with aplomb. Unfortunately, the linesman didn’t think he had run from deep enough and raised his flag. Again, just like last week Nathan scored a goal that was far above the standard of the rest of our performance. When the ball fell to him in the box, he fired an unstoppable shot past the helpless goal keeper. In doing so Nathan became The Oaks top scorer for the season with nine goals, overtaking Sharpy. With Sharpy now out of action we are going to be relying on Nathan much more heavily for goals over the rest of the season. When you consider that between the two of them they have scored over half of our goals, and the next closest active scorers are Deano and Rob with two a piece, you have some idea of the problem: 2-7.

Let’s hope this is the end of a unhappy period in The Oaks season, and lets try extra hard to restore some pride over the upcoming games.

Eye-Ball

Next game: Sunday 21st February, away @ Belhus Park

Stanford Wanderers 7 - 2 Oaks Athletic (League Game 10)

The Oaks are gaining a reputation for being slow starters, and were finally punished for this by a good Stanford Wanderers side who hade the game won by half time. In the first half they were superior in every department, and caused The Oaks problems with whichever route to goal they chose.

In the time it takes to cook store bought spaghetti (approximately 10 minutes) the Oaks were already two down. Firstly, a corner wasn’t adequately dealt with, and a simple prod was all that was required to give Stanford the lead, and then a straight forward ball in behind the back four caught us napping and the striker ran on to score: 2-0.

The referee could obviously see that something wasn’t right, and decided that a pitch that didn’t resemble mud soup would be more conducive to a properly contest game of football. The move to mud soup with a dash of seasoning (more commonly known as grass) did little to address the imbalance in performance, and Stanford scored three more goals in quick succession. One from a cross to the unmarked forward, a rare misjudgement from Ty (who probably underestimated the difficulty of rushing off your line whilst standing in quicksand), and a one-two with the cross bar from a corner: 5-0.

Although the score line and the performance were far from satisfactory, it is worth mentioning that The Oaks were in this as a team, took collective responsibility and continued to support and encourage each other. Things did improve slightly towards half time and we even managed to pull a goal back with a little help from their goalkeeper. In an incredible act of kindness he chose to palm Scott’s excellent corner into the net whilst being put under pressure by Deano: 5-1.

Although it has already happened once this season (a 6-2 defeat to Blackshots in the cup), a thrashing for the Oaks is about as rare as all of the following:

- Sharpy going a whole match without whinging;

- Parker changing his underwear;

- Deano wearing a coat;

- Gollum winning a header;

- Seeing one of Bill or Al without the other;

- Eye-Ball scoring;

- Aaron walking anywhere.

Therefore we were keen to put in a better performance in the second half; we only had pride to play for, but pride is important. Things did improve in the second half, with Parker being introduce to sure up the defence (yes, things were that bad!), and Nathan and Gollum linking up well up front. Although the ball in behind still seemed to cause us no end of problems Stanford actually started to miss chances, and Ty pulled off some fine saves to redeem for his earlier mistake.

Despite the improvements the next two goals still went Stanford’s way, but this time both had to be put down to bad luck. Deano and Ty agreed in principal on undertaking a back pass procedure, but hadn’t quite factored in the slow pitch and the proximity of the Stanford forward. Ty got to the ball first, but his attempted clearance ricocheted of the forward and into the bottom corner. The seventh goal was due to another assist by Eye-Ball (see Oaks v Legend). This time what appeared at first as a good intercepting sliding tackle – of which the main objective was to regain possession – turned into the sort of defence splitting pass that Kaka or Cesc Fabregas would be proud of. The Stanford striker duly accepted the plated delights and ran through to score: 7-1.

There were a few bright moments for the Oaks to take away from this game; including Eye-ball managing a shot on target (as if things couldn’t get any crazier!), but the keeper managed to tip the ball over as it was dipping under the crossbar, and we even managed to score a proper goal. Scott broke down the left, and his cross into the box found Deano who had advance into the penalty area (defending was pretty pointless by this point). With a man between him and the goal he unselfishly pulled the ball back for Nathan to score a well deserved goal: 7-2

Having already had a goal unfairly disallowed for off-side it would have been a travesty for Nathan not to come away with at least one goal to his name. He was by far and away our best performer, and although we take collective responsibility for the defeat our vice captain couldn’t have given any more.

As individuals we might not be the best players in the league, but The Oaks strengths have always been high intensity and dogged determination. This seems to have been lost over the last few weeks, and perhaps this result was the wake-up call we need. We’ve lost a few influential players - including Sharpy who is finally having his much needed operation (good luck mate) – and that means none of us can rely on others to put in the extra yards or create the chances. If we all give 100% and play to our full potential the results still might not always be what we want, but I guarantee we’ll enjoy the experience.

Eye-Ball

The team:
ppppppppppppppTyrone (GK)

ppDeano (RB) Milly (CB) Rob (CB) Aaron (LB)

pJordan (RM) Eye-Ball (CM) Stu (CM) (c) Scott (LM)

pppppppppppGollum (CF) Nathan (CF)

Subs: Jimmy, Parker

Next Match: Sunday 14th February @ Home v Stanford Wanderers