Concept B 1 - 3 Oaks Athletic

Last week I had the pleasure of describing Gollum’s first goal in 2 years, and today it was only the width of the crossbar which prevents me from writing of the end of an even longer goal drought – mine! I did score once when playing Under 14 football, but apart from that I haven’t managed a goal (not counting those at the wrong end) in an eleven aside match. This isn’t a big issue, and as long as Sharpy and co. keep banging them in I’m more than happy to stick to my job of helping to stop them going in at the other end. That said, we might need to start looking for a replacement No. 9 given our top scorer’s bizarre attempt to get an earlier-than-planned trip to Oz – someone could have told him it takes at least 5 weeks to get there by boat!

Manager Milesy is having to earn his money lately, as he once again had to change the team for this encounter. Milly was on family duty, and Bill was also absent. Captain Stu and Kieron did return, and the following side was named to start the game:

ppppaaaaaaaaaaaaaNNeil (GK)

pppParker (RB) Rob (CB) Deano (CB) Eye-Ball (LB)

pNathan (RM) Gollum (CM) Stu (CM) (c) Kieron (LM)

ppppaaaaaaaaaaaAl (CF) Sharpy (CF)

subs: Aaron, Jimmy

After a few tough games on the bounce this was game which – on paper – we felt we should win. However we really did not start well, and the only time I can recall a pass going where it was meant to was when I threw the ball to Nathan, after one of the numerous times I had to collect the ball from the other side of Blackshots Field. The only noteworthy incident of the first half was a very dubious penalty awarded to Concept following an apparent “push” by Deano on their small centre forward. The penalty was converted, and The Oaks went into half time 1 – 0 down.

I say that there was only one noteworthy incident of the first half, but I suppose I should mention the “lover’s tiff” between Sharpy and Nathan following one failed attempt to link up, with the dialogue going something like:

Nathan: “What are you doing running over there you infuriating halfwit?”

Sharpy: “I always run over there! How long have we been together, and you don’t know anything about me! And Halfwit! That’s rich coming from someone who thought that the sum of two fractions equals the sum of the numerator of the two fractions divided by the sum of the corresponding denominators!”

Nathan: “I do know that someone will be bathing alone tonight, and if you think I’m letting you use my loofah you’ve got another thing coming”

Sharpy: “Suits me fine. If you want to be the only one who cleans the toilet I’m not going to complain”.

Nathan: “…”

Following some far more constructive discussions during the half time interval, we took to the field for the second half determined to put in a better performance. We certainly achieved this, and started to play like the Oaks that had been so impressive in recent weeks. We defended from the front, and didn’t give our opponents time to settle on the ball. We also sorted out our passing, and our offence quartet of Kieron, Sharpy, Al and Nathan started to link up much more affectively.

It wasn’t long before we were back on level terms, and it was fitting that Nathan – who had been terrorising the Concept left back since the half began – should get his first goal of the season, when he game inside and slotted home inside the right-hand post with his weaker left foot.

The Oaks weren’t going to be happy settling for a draw, and with 15 minutes left to play it took another intervention from the referee to give us a golden opportunity to take the lead. Again Nathan was involved, as he made a run into the area, and just got to the ball before the onrushing keeper who could only upend Nathan and concede the penalty. Despite Deano reassuring members of the opposition that we don’t score penalties, Sharpy stepped up to calmly slot home from the compulsory 12 yards and consequently take the lead at the top of the scoring charts. Some of us were slightly concerned that he might aim for the corner flag rather than the goal given that he had previously shown a genuine phobia of shooting at goal despite making himself a quilt edge opening with a sublime turn.

At 2-1 The Oaks were comfortable, and Neil didn’t have a save to make. He is quickly becoming a commanding presence behind the back four, and the dealt with Concept’s long ball tactics with ease. We starting creating more chances, and Deano was particularly unlucky (and vocally disappointed) to see a well guided header from a corner cleared off the line.

Now we come to Eye-Ball’s “nearly” goal, which I have been given permission to describe in great detail. It was inevitable that Concept would commit more bodies forward in an attempt to find an equaliser, and when Kieron picked up the ball on the half way line Eye-Ball looked to exploit the space down the left wing. The ball was played over the top by the aforementioned Left Winger, and Eye-Ball gave chase, out-jumping the defenders who looked to snuff out the danger, and holding off the challengers as he advanced into the area. With the ball still bouncing, and the danger of being muscled off the ball being imminent, Eye-Ball stuck out the (un)trusty right boot and lifted the ball over the advancing keeper.

“This is it” I thought, “my first goal for The Oaks. How should I celebrate? Nathan’s already done the cartwheel (although that was pretty naff), so I’ll go for gyrating at the corner flag – the one that isn’t lying on the floor would probably be best”.

Unfortunately I didn’t bank on the below-regulation height goals at Blackshots (I will have a tape measure with me next week), and as the ball re-bounded off the cross bar I could only pick myself up and retreat back to the left back position. On the plus side, Concept failed to clear the ball as well as the crossbar had, and Nathan was able to double his goal tally with a blistering rising shot that gave the keeper no chance.

It was a relief to get the third goal; although we should have been able to defend the one goal lead, you just never know! It’s just a shame we didn’t finish off the game earlier. Because we were playing well, but didn’t score the third goal until late in the game, Milesy really couldn’t change the team, and as a consequence Jimmy and Aaron didn’t get a run out today. However they both showed a real team mentality (as always), and will get the chances their loyalty deserves.

Well played today everyone, and let’s make sure this is our first win of many in the league.

Eye-Ball

Next game: Sun 2nd Nov 10.30 K.O. vs Rec Rovers @ Blackshots (we’re at home so get there early to put up nets)

Goal Scoring Chart:

Kynoch Sports 3 – 2 Oaks Athletic (Dvision 2B Knock Out Cup)

This game will be remembered not so much for the disappointed of defeat, but for a special moment for one of the Oaks most loyal servants; Paul “Gollum” Webb. Gollum has taken a fair bit of flack (though all in good humour) for managing just one goal in two seasons, despite starting the majority of games at Centre Forward. This is not to say that Gollum hasn’t contributed significantly in other ways, and his determination and willingness to get stuck in has caused defences no end of problems. Al’s arrival this season has seen Gollum deployed in the centre of midfield, and he has relished his role as the “break up” man.

It was somewhat fitting that Gollum’s replacement in attack assitted in ending his goal drought, with Al’s corner finding the unmarked Gollum in the six yard box, who put the ball home with a bullet header to give the Oaks the lead midway through the first half. It was great to see Gollum score, and especially pleasing for our old friend Jacko who had come over to support us (although was there really any need to seem so amazed!).

Injuries and work commitments meant that milesy once again had to change the team around, with Aaron and Parker replacing Stu and Kieron in the starting eleven, which looked as follows:

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaNeil (GK)

aaParker (RB) Milly (CB) Deano (CB) (c) Eye-Ball (LB)

aaaaNathan (RM) Gollum (CM) Rob (CM) Aaron (LM)

aaaaaaaaaaa Sharpy (CF) Al (CF)

Subs: Bill, Jimmy.

In a high tempo first half The Oaks had chances to extend their lead, and also road their luck as Kynoch squandered some good chances. However this luck didn’t last for long, and the failure to deal with a long goal kick lead to the Kynoch striker crossing low for his team mate to tap in at the far post.

Injuries are still a major problem for The Oaks, and Vice-Captain Deano – who had been struggling since the initial warm up – had to reluctantly step down at half time and hand over the cursed arm band to Nathan. This meant another shake up from Tinkerman Milesy, with Rob moving back into defence and Bill coming on with the unenviable task of tracking Kynoch’s most influential player.

Having done more than hold our own for 45 minutes against a good side -who had spent the previous season in the Division One – it was a shame that we weren’t able to carry on where we had left off in the second half, as we allowed Kynoch to get on top of us. To be fair, they made much better use of the large Pegasus pitch, and their sustained period of possession finally bore fruit as the newly named “Titanium Pepperami” tried too hard to intercept a floated cross into the danger area, and only succeeded in flattening the opposition player. The ref had no hesitation in awarding the penalty, which was subsequently converted to give Kynoch a 2-1 lead.

Kynoch remained on top following the goal, and The Oaks players – by their own admission – failed to raise their game to the required level. Sharpy even admitted that he would have substituted himself, by what could he do ...”he’s not the manager”. Nathan rightly tried to encourage his troops to put more pressure on the opposition higher up the pitch, but unfortunately a third goal for Kynoch came before an equaliser. There was still to be a potentially interesting finish as Al slotted home smartly between the keeper’s legs from 20 yards to make the score 3-2, but unfortunately the only other noteworthy incident was in the bar where Deano fulfuilled a lifetime ambition of burping, coughing, and sneezing at the same time.

I don’t think any of us would disagree that the better team won on the day, but what was encouraging was that we all felt we could, and should have done better – so let’s up it again next week!

Eye Ball

Next game – Sun 26th Oct 10.30 K.O vs Concept B @ Blackshots (Away) (league match)

Oaks Athletic 3 - 2 Linford Wanderers (Combined League Cup)

The Oaks are starting to show real self-belief, as they twice came from behind to win a match in which they were by far the better side.

I'm afraid I don't know the official name of this cup competition (it's probably something like the Dulux Dog Magnolia Challenge Cup), but it's basically the one where you can meet any team from the five divisions of the Thurrock Sunday League. The draw for the first round saw The Oaks pitted against Linford Wanderers, who are in our league this year and beat us 4-2 in the same competition 2 seasons ago.

Manager Milesy decided not to stick with the team that had played so well the previous week against Belhus Park, and instead chose to put the returning Rob and Eye-Ball back in and hand a starting spot to Kieran, who had really impressed the previous week when coming on as a sub. I'm sure everyone will agree that having Kieran available regularly will add an extra bit of class - even if it means our centre backs can't see much when he is playing with Gollum in the midfield.


The starting 11 for today's game was as follows:

Neil (GK)

Deano (RB) Rob (CB) Milly (CB) Eye-ball (LB)

Nathan (RM) Gollum (CM) Stu (CM) (c) Kieran (LM)

Al (ST) Sharpy (ST)

and this left Parker, Jimmy, Bill and Aaron starting on the bench.

The Oaks kicked-off the match, playing towards the flats in the lifting fog. It was a bright start, with The Oaks quickly settling into the slick passing game that is becoming a bit of a trademark. There was a really good balance to the side, with Nathan and Kieran linking up time and again with Al and Sharpy to provide a real attacking threat, whilst Stu and Gollum held their ground in the midfield, preventing the opposition from having any sustained posession. With the back four looking comfortable, and Neil obvioiusly having put the previous week behind him, there was really only one team that looked likely to win - and the only surprise was that The Oak went behind after 20 minutes.

On their first attacks of any note Linford got the ball into the heart of The Oaks penalty area, but when a good block from Rob was prevented from going behind by the arm of a Linford player on the ground, the injustice felt by the absence of any whistle from the referee was compounded by the fact that a Linford player was consequently able to fire the ball into the net to give his side an undeserved 1-0 lead.

The frustration caused by this horendous decision unsettled The Oaks, but composure was soon restored, and it wasn't long until the equaliser arrived. The referee was not having the best of games, and when Rob was barged off the ball in the opposition penalty area he decided that this offence was only worthy of an indirect free-kick! In hindsight we can't complain about the decision, as Nathan rolled the ball into Stu's path to calmy drill the ball into the bottom left hand corner and level the scores. The only person still slightly disappointed was Sharpy, who saw his chance of catching Al in the scoring chart snatched away (because of course he would have scored the penalty).

This score proved the catalyst for all out war on the Linford Wanderers goal; unfortunately the Linford keeper wasn't ready to throw in the towel, as he pulled out a string of quite remarkable saves to keep the score at 1-1 going in at half time.

The Oaks weren't able to start the second half in the dominating fashion they had displayed in the first, and Linford were able to get on the front foot. The home side were subsequently made to pay when some slack defending, and a failure to clear the ball on several consecutive occasions lead to the replacement winger getting on the end of a tame throw-in to slot in and put Linford 2-1 up.

The Oaks had shown in the first half that they were capable of creating genuine scoring chances from open play, but as always we were still very dangerous from set-pieces. It was from the tried and tested O'Kerin bullet throw that The Oaks equalised for the second time; Sharpy once again causing all sorts of problems in the box and finally converting with his rosy cheeks. 2-2.

2-2 soon turned to 3-2, as The Oaks took the lead for the first time. Linford's policy of launching it long in an attempt to capatilise on the rising sun back-fired as Neil confidently collect one such long ball, and whose quick distribution saw the ball find it's was through to Sharpy, who wasn't about to give the keeper more saving practise as he calmly slotted the ball into the corner.

The game was by no means over, and Linford pushed forward looking for an equaliser. It was all hands to the pumps, and some dogged defending plus some outstanding saves from Neil - including a fine reaction stop from a volley from about 8 yards - saw The Oaks over the line.

Well done to all for the first (and overdue) win of the season; now let's make it a habit. I hope those who didn't make it on this week feel like they contributed to the team effort. We've got a really strong squad, and if we have 15 players turning up every week those who do start will know they have to perform because Milesy will know he can replace anyone not pulling their weight with someone eager to impress.

Eye-Ball

Next Game : Sun 19th Oct - 10.30 KO Vs Kynoch Sports @Pegasus Club (another cup game)

Goal scoring chart:

Belhus Park Ath 2 - 2 Oaks Athletic

I'm not really in a position to comment on this match, as I wasn't there and I haven't seen the highlights on Match of the Day yet!

I have been reliably informed that The Oaks could (and possibly should) have won the game, and that early fears that we might be out of our depth in this league have already been dispelled.

Well done to Al for bagging his first two goals for The Oaks - I'm sure there will be many more to come.

If someone lets me know the starting 11 (and who came on as sub) I'll update the scoring chart. Also if you want to supply any info about the game I will add it to the report.

Well done lads.

Eye-Ball